Question from One of My Beauties:

Yes you read that right! I’ve been doing this for weeks now and I still don’t feel right calling my avid readers and dedicated followers my fans so instead I’ll call you my beauties! With all of the love and support you have shown me, you all are absolutely beautiful to me J. It was so weird because for the first time I was walking out and about and I was actually recognized by one of my readers! It was so weird so I didn’t know how to respond, but it felt so good. Sad to say that I didn’t get the girls name or information, so in the future if you see me PLEASE make sure to share it! I would love to capture a little of your story and even a picture so that I can share it here. Remember that this is not just my blog, but this is OUR blog for all of us!

With that said, the young lady asked me a question that I receive quite frequently so I decided it would be a good idea to answer it.

How do you know when it’s time to move on and when it’s time to try harder?

I really wish I had a dry, cut and paste answer here but the only person who can really answer that question is YOU. Love is a two way street and it’s not meant for the journey to be taken alone. If you find yourself at the crossroad wondering if it’s worth it to continue, then sadly you’ve probably already answered your own question. We like to think that we have the power to persuade someone with our words and actions and in some cases that could be true, but why would you want to be in a relationship with someone who doesn’t want is as bad as you do?

Any successful relationship is going to require a LOT of patience, dedication and work, but one thing love should never do is hurt. What helped me make my decision to split came down to me answering two questions.

If Khloe had to endure the things that I had to in order to have the strength to write this blog, sadly I would be answering these questions from inside of a jail cell. With that said, I realized with answering my first question that neither my daughter or myself benefited from me putting forth any extra effort into the relationship I had already put so much blood, sweat, and tears into. If answering those two questions doesn’t give you the answer you want than it’s time to take out a sheet of paper and make a list. I did it and believe me it helped. Sometimes we stay fighting for the wrong reasons. Often times, we are in love with who that person was and who that person was supposed to be in our future instead of recognizing that person for who they are today. Stay honest with yourself when you are writing a list of your pros and cons and see if you are still in love with the person or simply the memory of who that person once was to you. 

In a relationship it IS important to learn to work together as a team and to compromise for your partner, but you should never have to conform who you are and what you believe in just to be in a relationship. There is nothing worse than if that relationship ends and you are left with the question, “who am I?”

The beauty of staying true to yourself and accepting nothing less than you deserve is that you are the one that is in control of your happiness and no one else. Often times we look for our significant other to provide us with a sense of safety, security, and happiness, when we have the keys to do it alone all along.

Moral of the Story: We experience plenty of mediocre things throughout our life and love should definitely not be one of them; if it’s not passionate, and more importantly, happy and healthy, than it’s simply not worth it. In the end – REAL LOVE- will withstand all things and obstacles. If it is meant to be no amount of space or distance will be able to keep you apart from the one you are meant to be with.